The Number 23 starts off with… to be honest, I don’t remember the movie at
all. It just sucks. They figured it would be a good idea to cast Jim
Carey for the main role because who else but a comedian would fit the
role of a serious drama movie?
So Carey tries to be serious but the whole time you are just expecting him to say “AAAAAALRIGHTY THEN!” or make a reference to an SNL skit or do re-do a scene from The Grinch. Throughout the movie, absolutely nothing happens. Usually you would expect there to be some sort of plot-like structure to the movie, but not this one. He finds a book and thinks it’s cool or something and then he realizes he can count to 23. This is where the movie takes a turn for the worst. So Carey starts counting everything and does his best to rationalize how none of it makes sense. For example, “For example” has 10 letters. And it’s two words. 10x2=20 and 20 has two digits (now at 22) plus the one digit you are missing to get to 23. Oh.My.God.
His wife thinks he is losing his mind (she’s quite the detective) and
urges him to stop being an idiot and get a real job. He refuses and
continues to deliver packages ( I’m pretty sure I’m remembering that
correctly) because he wants to be like Doug from King of Queens.
Incidentally, that’s a great show and I suggest you watch that instead
of The Number 23. Speaking of which, the title of that movie has 11
letters in it. 11x2 is 22. And there are 2 words and 2 digits that make
up the title so you add 4 (26) but you could argue that the title is 3
words long because you read “23” as a word, not a number and so,
naturally, you subtract 3 and you are now at 23. Coincidence? Oh.My.God.
At some point in the movie, there is a flashback of a moment that serves as absolutely no purpose to the viewer. That flashback later becomes of some importance because it explains something that you probably weren’t even thinking about or didn’t really care about it in the first place. There is a bookstore where he finds the book and then he reads it and there is a girl who is connected to the word “Pink” because pink has 4 letters and 23-4 is 19 so she must be 19, I guess. Anyway, so Carey likes this book a little too much and he hides it under his mattress along with his resumé because he realizes the movie is going to flop. (Okay, maybe I’m mistaken about that last part). But he really does like that book a lot. It’s red..I think. Red has 3 letters. Red is a primary colour. Primary has 7 letters. Plus the 3 from red…10…two words, 20…and..Come on Jim, THINK! Three letters in Jim! 20+3. No way. I think I just wrote the sequel.
Seriously, the movie sucks. How much does it suck? I walked out
during it because I couldn’t even begin to fathom how this movie made it
past the drawing board. I just imagine them pitching the concept…
Alright, so how many people are in this meeting? 12? And we all have 2
eyes…right? 12x2 is 24… But that guy has a lazy eye! So it’s really only
23! Now follow me here, what if the entire movie made as much sense as
this discussion? …That guy was either fired or given a bonus of $23,000.
Wait.. F-I-R-E-D can be written as F-R-I-E-D which rhymes with Cried
which is what I thought about doing when I watched this movie.. and
Cried involves Tears… Which sounds like Beers… and you can buy 24 beers…
But then you drop one so now you only have… 23. Which, coincidentally,
is what you will need to be able to make it through the entire movie.
Okay, so that wasn’t much of a review. But I feel better now that
I’ve complained about the movie and it will go onto a website that no
one will ever read. So I apologize if YOU had to read this because this
explained absolutely nothing and will probably make you want to go out
and rent the movie to try to prove me wrong. I think that’s the part I
should be apologizing the most for. Do yourself a favour, don’t see the
movie. Or at least watch the movie on a tv that you don’t really care
about so you can throw things at it and not worry when you eventually
set it on fire and scream vernaculars into the night.
I think I might stick to writing articles about phobias because I tend to ramble when I write about something I actually have an opinion about. Anyways, so the point is, don’t watch The Number 23. Not because it sucks ( well, that too..) but because it has absolutely no plot, makes next to no sense, and it sucks.
So Carey tries to be serious but the whole time you are just expecting him to say “AAAAAALRIGHTY THEN!” or make a reference to an SNL skit or do re-do a scene from The Grinch. Throughout the movie, absolutely nothing happens. Usually you would expect there to be some sort of plot-like structure to the movie, but not this one. He finds a book and thinks it’s cool or something and then he realizes he can count to 23. This is where the movie takes a turn for the worst. So Carey starts counting everything and does his best to rationalize how none of it makes sense. For example, “For example” has 10 letters. And it’s two words. 10x2=20 and 20 has two digits (now at 22) plus the one digit you are missing to get to 23. Oh.My.God.
This looks like a case for Bruce Almighty: Animal Detective!
At some point in the movie, there is a flashback of a moment that serves as absolutely no purpose to the viewer. That flashback later becomes of some importance because it explains something that you probably weren’t even thinking about or didn’t really care about it in the first place. There is a bookstore where he finds the book and then he reads it and there is a girl who is connected to the word “Pink” because pink has 4 letters and 23-4 is 19 so she must be 19, I guess. Anyway, so Carey likes this book a little too much and he hides it under his mattress along with his resumé because he realizes the movie is going to flop. (Okay, maybe I’m mistaken about that last part). But he really does like that book a lot. It’s red..I think. Red has 3 letters. Red is a primary colour. Primary has 7 letters. Plus the 3 from red…10…two words, 20…and..Come on Jim, THINK! Three letters in Jim! 20+3. No way. I think I just wrote the sequel.
 |
| Jim Carey preparing for another serious role |
I think I might stick to writing articles about phobias because I tend to ramble when I write about something I actually have an opinion about. Anyways, so the point is, don’t watch The Number 23. Not because it sucks ( well, that too..) but because it has absolutely no plot, makes next to no sense, and it sucks.
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